I am a neuroqueering neuroqueer
A birthday card I received from my brother in 2021. An old white man with long white hair and a long white beard wearing a grey shirt is next to printed text “Happy fucking whatever, man”. My brother has written WO before the word man in blue pen, so it reads “Happy fucking whatever, woman.”
If someone asks me “What is your sexuality?” or “What is your gender?” and is expecting a one-word, supremely general response, the answer I give is neuroqueer.
My introduction to and understanding of the term owes much to “queer, transgender, and flamingly autistic” Nick Walker. My reinterpretation of her definition is that neuroqueering is the embodied experience of rejecting neuronormativity and cisheteronormativity while embracing disability and difference.
In her essay she describes neuroqueer as a verb first and an adjective second, but to me it is also a noun. I am a neuroqueer. It is a better description than to say I am a woman, or I am a nonbinary person, or I am neurodivergent, or I am pansexual, or I am queer. Labeling myself as a neuroqueer is a representation of my lived experience, which is that sexuality, gender and neurotype cannot be disentangled.
Neuroqueer philosophy cannot be integrated into the dominant cultural constructs of gender and sexuality. It is neither. It rejects the idea that those categories even exist in lived experiences. Neuroqueer is not a label that can be assigned at birth, for only the individual themselves can declare that they are neuroqueer.
This is in part why it doesn't bother me that when I move in the world people will not look at me and think “neuroqueer.” It is the same to me as someone saying that I am Roman Catholic just because I have been baptised. I know what I am. That is what matters to me.
As with all labels, “You’re neuroqueer if you neuroqueer” - Nick Walker
